at times

i forget that at one time i knew this was where i was supposed to be.

especially when i spend my nights and mornings alone crying.
and when i have to spend my afternoons in my room
because i don't want to take time away from their alone time.

or when i turn off my light at ten thirty and turn it right back on at seven thirty.

and when i miss my home more than i ever knew i could.

but then i get those texts that couldn't come at a more perfect time.
and he's always there to listen even though he has his own life.

and my prayers are more heartfelt and pleading than they ever have been before.
and i know that He's listening and giving me the strength that i'm asking for.

it just takes time i think.
to get used to living here again.

love, j.