twenty thirteen.

no quejarse.

love, j.

i wish

that i could take five steps back.
and not care so much.

so that it was just a crush.
and it wouldn't occupy all my thoughts and energy.
and be a part of all my plans.

i wish that i could live in every moment.
and not worry about everything else.

i wish that i could learn everything that i do at college
and still get to see my family everyday.

and that i could stop being such a complainer.
and be grateful for all of my blessings.

i wish that i could get good grades without all the stress.
and that i knew i was going to have a job that i love.

i wish that i wouldn't care so much about spending money.
and that i would be a fun person to be around.

i wish that i would decide what i want to major in.
so that taking the classes would have a definite purpose.

i wish that i would always have nice thoughts.
and that i would be kinder.

because wishes are kind of like goals.
especially if i try to make them happen.

love, j.

2012.

it means making a new folder to put my pictures in.
and that i'll turn 19 this year.

it means that i'll finish my whole first year of college.
and start my second.

and it means living with everything that i've already learned.
and learning even more.

it means saying goodbye again.
and this time hoping that it's for real.

it means that i'll continue to cry when things are hard.
and then even more for no reason at all.

it means learning to live with people when i'm homesick.
and trying to make the best out of every situation.

and it means that i get to make new goals.
and try to accomplish them better than i did last year.

here's to the new year.
and knowing that it's my choice
how it's going to turn out.

love, j.

december one. twenty eleven.

I started thinking about what my twenty twelve goals are going to be today.
that's weird. 2011 is almost over.
but I kind of like it.
This year was hard.
The hardest that I've had so far.
and I'm excited for the fresh new start.
to be a new me.

and you know what?
i'm going to start today.
because today is december 1.
and I can do whatever I want.

also,
17 more days until we're all together again.
and I honestly can't wait.
It gives me happy butterflies in my stomach thinking about it.

I can't wait to be home.
to have no homework.
to sleep in my own bed.
and to wake up to my family.
or to those two girls.
because we're having more black sweat sleepovers.
i'm sure of it.

here's to december.
a month of snow.
and of christmas spirit.
i love it already.

love, j.

i'm thankful.

//for older brothers who are willing in the first place to take me home at ten thirty at night so that I could have as much time as I could with him. and then don't get mad when I come home late anyway.

//for knowing that it wasn't goodbye forever.

//for best friends who know just when to text me to talk about just what I need to.

//for new friends who let me copy their notes because I missed three days of class.

//for families that let me in and make me part of them even though I'm not.

//for fun card games with that family.

//for a mom who sees me crying and hugs me and says "think about something else. it's hard but it will all be okay."

//for a hug and a kiss tonight. and for i love you.

//for i'll see you in two years.

//for motivation. to exercise. to do homework. to continue on.

//for lessons that teach me not to judge.

//for opportunities that are soo hard but that make me stronger.

//for new songs. <holding out for a hero - ella mae bowen>

//for time alone.

//for being able to call and text him still.

//for watching movies in class.

// for goals. to be better.

//for knowing that everything will work out the way it's supposed to.

love. j.

goal finally completed.

Since it's the last day in April and I failed to post my picture of the day for the past 19 days, here they are..

Day 11 - Jamie, Ang, & McKay

Day 12 - Bear River Lodge

Day 13 - finished quote books!

Day 14 - Happy 18th Birthday to me :)

Day 15 - Whit, Heather, Estee, Courtney, Jenny, J, Mo

Day 16 - completely cleaning the room.

Day 17 - the finished clean room.

Day 18 - These cookies had 3 ingredients total.

Day 19 - Ang, Samuel, Spencer

Day 20 - desperate for a picture.

Day 21 - never been so happy for my bed

Day 22 - Michael & Jamie @ Ang's cold lacrosse game

Day 23 - Mo's Shopping Adventures

Day 23-2 - a bag of goodness for $1.30

Day 23-3 - new sandals!

Day 24 - Easter! Coloring eggs :)

Day 25 - Savannah, CURTIS, Daniel

Day 26 - Michael "doing homework"

Day 27 - "Gandolf!!!"

Day 28 - April 2011 goals

Day 29

Day 30 - Snow on the last day of April :(

Even though nobody really gets any of the pictures except me and a few other people..that's okay. I'm just glad the month is over :)
Love,
J.

18.

18 things I want to do while I'm 18
 In no particular order...

1. Go to Snow College with my only sister

2. Go on a vacation

3. Be able to do.. 50 pushups. (maybe get in shape?/do not gain the freshman 15)

4. Study my scriptures and pray everyday

5. Learn to whistle (the loud/cool/with your fingers way)

6. Attend the temple at least once a week

7. Keep my scholarship.

8. Learn something new every day.

9. Hike.. A lot!
10. Donate blood.
11. Vote!
12. Read at least 18 books. :)
13. Graduate from High School
14. Go camping
15. Buy a yellow shirt
16. Take lots of pictures!
17. Become a true badger
18. Ride a horse

Love.
J. Szabo